Persimmons?
by TheCrazyPeople
Summary: Mitsunari and friends decided to head to a festival... Full of persimmons. Then only to have one of the most strange and cruel practical jokes pulled on the fox-like man... Something terrible is taking place... (A bit of Saihai no Yukue thrown in there, because of the persimmon thing)


Hello Everybody! How are you all? Hope you all are doing well! So, I wrote a one-shot for you all, so I hope you all enjoy it! By the way, this story's stars a fake festival, or at least I think it's fake. I don't know, I just made it up! Teehee! By the way, characters might be a bit OOC, mostly because they would never react to something so... Minor. Also, Mitsunari's inner self is like a separate being. He represents the more childish him. Because we all know underneath that cocky butt is a childish kid. (Not really.)

The sweets in this story are real; just google it. Also, I don't know if they are right, so correct me if I am wrong.

Disclaimer: I don't own things. HAHAHAHAHAHAhahaha... I'm done.

_Italics _are going to be Mitsunari's thoughts.

* * *

Mitsunari Ishida had just woken up to a great day... Perfect for a day of relaxation. He had been looking forward to this day for quite some time now, and he couldn't wait for the day ahead of him.

Upon waking up, Mitsunari abandoned his usual attire consisting of his aristocrat clothes and headdress, and instead changed into a much more comfortable yukata and immediately headed out. Trying his best to avoid anyone, he sneaked out of the castle and walked down a back road that lead towards the town nearby. He couldn't stop thinking about his precious tea or reading a cheesy book.

_"I hope no one finds me here... Or else they'll never let me live it down..." _Mitsunari knew the consequences of taking a day off. The last time he took a break, everyone wouldn't stop bothering him about how he finally took a break, or maybe this was a sign that he was breaking out of his shell, or that he was an impostor. Even Kanetsugu, who was an honorable person; was mocking him for his unexpected break.

Finally reaching the town and sighing, Mitsunari realized that the town was a little more... Loud than usual. Almost energetic.

_"Yes, it's the weekend, but I feel like there's something much more going on in the background..."_ Mitsunari closed his eyes and pondered a bit.

"Mitsunari! It's quite the surprise to see you here! Why don't you join us?" Flinching and mentally facepalming himself at the voice, he turned around to see many of his friends. He saw Kanetsugu approaching him with his usual 'ai' hat, Kiyomasa with his tiger belt, Masanori with his "interesting" haircut, Sakon with his giant sword, and Yukimura with his six coin bandana.

"Kanetsugu... How did you manage to find me?" Mitsunari didn't really exactly want to go with them... They bothered the heck out of him, and he couldn't really stand being with them all day. Having to deal with the idiotic Masanori or the dunce-like Yukimura was already a headache within itself.

"Mitsunari, are you seriously that oblivious?" said one of his friends, Kiyomasa. "You were so restless during the week... We thought you had found someone special for once," Mitsunari's inner self tilted his head in confusion; and sensing Mitsunari was confused, Kiyomasa only sighed.

"Anyway," said Sakon, who had just joined them. "We're headed to a festival... You want to come along?"

_"A-A festival?! Yay!"_ His inner self jumped around in happiness; but that had no effect on his actual self. Nodding, Mitsunari followed along slowly, hoping for an opportunity to sneak away. All he wanted was to be alone!

"Whoooaaa! For once, Mitsunari wants to come with us?! Well, that's new!" said Masanori, who hit Mitsunari really hard on the shoulder.

"Idiot! Why in the world would I hang out with you?! I'm obviously doing it for the other people's sake!" and unfortunately, the day had already gotten off on a rocky start, mostly because of the two's bickering.

"Anyway, Lord Kanetsugu," said Yukimura, talking over the noisy boys, who was really excited to get to the festival, "What is the festival about, anyway?"

"I heard it had to do something with crops," said Sakon, joining in on their conversation, "They said that they got a pretty good harvest this year, almost the best."

Upon arriving to the festival, Mitsunari finally saw what the whole commotion was all about... And he wasn't very happy about it. All he wanted to do at that point was to run away.

_"A-A festival of persimmons? NOOOOOO!"_ Terrible hatred had risen from Mitsunari, for he had hated the orange fruit. And that was for many reasons.

* * *

Flashback

It all started when he was ten.

"You've been a naughty child!" A flighty yellow ninja was scolding poor Mitsunari... He had gotten into another fight with his brothers, and this time, he wasn't so lucky. "I will punish you for your fight today! You should learn to get along with your brothers better!"

The ninja had locked the poor kid in an empty room, and unfortunately, what the ninja didn't know was that people were loading things into the room during the night. Now, poor Mitsunari was in an empty, DARK room, so the movers never noticed the crying, shivering, scared boy as they moved the things in. And what were the things, you might ask?

Well, they moved many boxes of persimmons in, and they filled the room up from the floor to the ceiling. Little Mitsunari, or Sakichi at the time, had the same hatred for persimmons as his adult self, but the terrible factor was, that Nene had forgotten about him.

For days on end, he had to feed himself with persimmons, and when he was found, he was already very sick and hysterical. In fact, the minuscule kid had gotten food poisoning shortly afterwards.

* * *

"Ah! Persimmons! I wonder what they have in there! Let's go!" Yukimura, being the happy get go guy that he was, ran straight into festival area, tempting the others to follow in suit.

"Hey... Has anyone noticed that Mitsunari's being really quiet...?" Kanetsugu said, pointing out how Mitsunari was pouting and not speaking.

"Hey! You know that I'm right here!" yelled Mitsunari, waving his arms, who also somehow frowned even more. "It's... Just that I don't enjoy persimmons as much as other foods."

"Haha, sure," said Sakon, who knew about the cranky, effeminate aristocrat's hate for persimmons, "And I can't play the biwa as well as other instruments." As he said it sarcastically, as Mitsunari punched the man.

"Hey, look!" said Kiyomasa, hoping to change the subject, "They have all kinds of foods made out of persimmon! Look, they have anmitsu made from persimmon! They have all kinds of sweets! Let's go eat there!"

"Uh, I-I'm fine. I'm not that hungry..." Mitsunari was trying to drop small hints to tell them that he didn't exactly want to be here.

"Eh?" said the very oblivious Yukimura, "But Lord Mitsunari, there's this huge festival, and you don't feel like eating?" He sounded on par to a child, and he most certainly acted like a child.

"Alright," said Sakon, hiding a smirk. "We'll just go in without you, ok? Stay out of trouble." They all left Mitsunari alone, and Mitsunari was very upset, but listened to Sakon. However, what Mitsunari didn't know was that there was a plan brewing between the five. They all knew about Mitsunari's less than unfortunate incident.

"What am I...? Your child?" he said, mumbling under his breath.

* * *

Meanwhile...

The five had not gone into the building, for they actually went BEHIND the building. Making sure Mitsunari was out of sight, Sakon, Kiyomasa, and Masanori began to discuss a plan.

"W-Wait... Are you sure Mitsunari wouldn't mind?" Sakon, Kiyomasa, Masanori all nodded to Yukimura's question. No doubt that Yukimura was very gullible, and they had no trouble convincing him into their plan. But that wasn't the problem.

"I believe that this is dishonorable, I will not allow this nonsense to come through!" The three of them looked at Kanetsugu hungrily, and they tackled the poor, preaching man.

"Mmmph! Wha are you doing? Stoppppp!" Kanetsugu had his mouth immediately stuffed with a cloth, and the three tied him up to a wooden board nearby. They left the man there, who was still struggling with all of his might.

"Now, now, Yukimura," said Sakon, turning his head slowly around, warning the red-cladded warrior with a nasty smile that made anyone's hair stand on end, "If you won't be a good little boy... Then you might end up to be like little Kanetsugu here..." Now that really scared poor Yukimura.

"Aaaiiieeee! Alright, alright! I-I'll b-be a good l-little boy! I promise, I promise!"

"Alright... Now, here's the plan..."

* * *

"Finally. I was wondering when you guys were getting back," said Mitsunari, who saw the four coming and immediately crossed his arms. "Hey, where's Kanetsugu?"

The four of them looked at each other, with three of them smirking, and Masanori said, "He's a little tied up right now..."

"And as for you..." Kiyomasa then tackled the aristocrat, getting a "What the hell?" from the fox man and managed to take the guy out. "Alright. It's time now, don't you agree?" And the three laughed, with a freaked out Yukimura in the mix.

* * *

When Mitsunari woke up, he couldn't see anything but black.

_"What is going on...? Am I tied up? What in the world happened?"_ Suddenly, he felt what seemed to be fruit hitting him. And the room was instantly filled with a cringing aroma; an aroma that he knew too well.

_"Oh... NOOOOOO!" _Mitsunari began to struggle, but only to be hit with more of his least favorite fruit... Persimmon. But luckily for him, a light appeared. But unfortunately for him, Sakon was holding it.

"I see that you have woken up, dear Mitsunari," said Sakon, while still pelting fruit at him. "It was a pain in the butt to get these fruits... I hope you enjoy them."

"Indeed," said Kiyomasa, with an eerie smile while popping up beside him, getting Mitsunari's attention. "So, we'll be feeding you... With your most beloved fruit... Eeheehee..." And then he forcefully stuffed a spoonful of the mushed fruit into the now on the verge of crying man. "We all know how much you like persimmon... And we acknowledge your INCIDENT... I hope you appreciate how much we LOVE you..." he said sarcastically.

"W-why?" Mitsunari said, before having his mouth stuffed with more persimmon, and all in the meanwhile having fruit thrown at him, "I-I didn't do anything wrong...! Eep- *stuffed*"

"But Mitssuunaarriii!" whined Masanori, as he began to bring in more boxes of fruit in, "We loooovvee you! And can't you take a small joke!?"

"J-Joke?!" said Mitsunari, suddenly in a rage, "You guys find this to be amusing?!"

"Of course we do," said Sakon, who laughed at Mitsunari's reaction, "Why did you think we did it? We want to see the soft Mitsunari once in a while," he spoke, before dodging a fist coming at his way. "H-Hey... How did you get untied...?"

He saw that Masanori and Kiyomasa had already been knocked out, and he was so astounded by how it was even possible, he didn't notice a second punch heading his way.

Expecting the worst of the worst, Sakon was ready to take the hit. But it never came. Instead, Mitsunari's fist was inches from his own face, and Mitsunari returned to a more graceful position.

"You know I could never hit you, right? Let's just say... You're way too special for that." Relieved at Mitsunari's mercy, Sakon laughed and followed the fox-like man out of the building. But who they forgot about was a certain red-cladded and scared boy... And he was watching from the very smallest corner...

"N-No way... Mitsu-chan likes Sakon?!"

* * *

How was that for a change? It certainly is a refreshing sight and it was quite the silly story. I added a small MitsunarixSakon, so I hope fans of those like that. And if you want, you can suggest a couple in a review, and I'll try my best in writing the pairing! So, I hope you all like the one-shot!

Fact of the Day (Wow, it's been too long since I've written this...) : I really hate it when people say I'll never understand something... It's like saying humans will never die. And plus, the person doesn't even know me, so I hate that the most. The person even went as far as saying I'll never experience a type of pain. (And by the way, I actually did, so I knew what I was talking about... sigh.) But hey, forgive, but never forget. (I do not mean to offend anyone, please don't get mad at me!)

See you guys later!


End file.
